Day 112: What Did Batman Say To Robin?

Holy Porno, Batman! Meg Ryan Is Getting More Than Just Mail!

You’ve seen it at the end of every romantic comedy. If it’s not at the end, then it’s definitely somewhere in the middle; that one electrically charged kiss that releases all the tension the two main characters have been building. The question is though, what happens to the couple next?

Are we to believe that that’s it? They kiss and live happily ever after?! They kiss then go to lunch?! They kiss then high-5?! What happens, god damn it!?

In this thought I will be using Meg Ryan (ShopGirl) and Tom Hanks (NY152) From You’ve Got Mail. (Yes I looked these up.) At the end of this date movie Tom Hanks calls Meg Ryan “ShopGirl” right before they kiss, and the movie ends with them kissing in Central Park. What they do not show, however, is that immediately after, Ms. Ryan stops in the middle of the kiss and asks, “Wait. Did… Did you just call me by my screen name?” Then laughs. Tom is befuddles. Here, they just shared this intensely charged kiss and she asks if he called her “ShopGirl”?!? He of course says, “No, I said, ‘Don’t cry…No Pearls’… or something.”

They then go back to her apartment, midday on a like a Tuesday or something, why they’re not at work I have no clue, for a nice little romp (also not shown). 3 ½ minutes later they finish up. He goes back to business of destroying her business, but she doesn’t care anymore, because she’s doing a rich guy now. Now they live happily ever after. Done and done.