Day 50: If I Ruled Liechtenstein...No Creeps Allowed

As Duke of Liechtenstein, I have decided, in what hope does not sound too Hitleresque, that certain styles are to be outlawed. Now, I realize Hitler sought a blue eyed, blonde haired race to dominate Germany (which is ironic because have you seen his pictures?), and this will sort of sound like similar if you break it down to its bare bones, but believe me, dear reader. This. Is. Necessary.

I have decided, and my Board of Checks & Balances agree, the hipster comb over, as pictured below will only be allowed on children up to age 9 and pedophiles. Old men are allowed to have it as well, but a special permit will be needed and will be given on a case by case basis by a licensed beautician.

Unless you are in some obscure band, 9 years old or are an old man, if you have this style haircut, you look like a creep, pedophile, serial rapist, or something weird you see on TV. This is not to say that hipsters are not allowed in my country. They are very welcome with the understanding that residents will simply blow dry your hair out of its creepy nest.

Here are some examples of accepted and non-accepted practices:

Fail

Fail

Pass (but only because of the guitar in his hand)

Fail

Pass (but only because he was bad ass in the movie)

Again, as seen by my examples, if you are not 9 years old, you look like a fucking creep. If you come into my country with this style haircut and continue to go on your path after fair warning, please be prepared to have your head nuggied. probably with a quarter.