Day 61: Shakespeare's High School Poetry ... On Chin Pubes

An ode poem is usually a lyric poem of moderate length, with a serious subject, an elevated style, and an elaborate stanza pattern. The ode often praises people, the arts of music and poetry, natural scenes, or abstract concepts. The Romantic poets used the ode to explore both personal or general problems; they often started with a meditation on something in nature, as did Keats in "Ode to a Nightingale" or Shelley in"Ode to the West Wind."

Me being, well, me, I simply cannot write something that is supposed to be heavily serious too seriously. If I did, I'm afraid, dear reader, you'd have to go another week without something to waste 5 minutes of your precious time. *Full disclosure - I wrote 2, but this is the one you're getting.

Chin Pubes Of Mine

 

i can grow you quickly

but you never grown in full

you make me look homeless

sometimes dirty, occasionally sort of cool

you grow in patches

that make me stop and pause

and wonder why i can't grow a douche bag beard

handlebar, or something ambitious like a santa claus

no 5 o'clock shadow

and certainly no fu manchu

i can't grow in mutton chops

no curly side burns like a hasidic jew

but you make me look older

in a not wisdom filled sort of way

with you i rarely get carded

because i'll actually look 21 on a given, good day

i love you and i hate you

sometimes it's just not fair

how you sit there and mock me

and grow in patchy like ass hair

i am quite happy though

that i don't look like a creep

like a rapist or serial killer

or pedophile on the street.

so thank you chin pubes

i don't know what i'd do

if everyday i had to shave

my face and crotch too